Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!

I went to the gym at 8:30 this morning (Sunday), and it was deserted.  There were a few elderly folk working up a sweat, but it was quiet and calm and completely uncrowded.  I had my pick of machines, and it was a nice relaxing workout, free from the stench of sweat or cologne from the person next to me... because there was no person next to me.  It was glorious!  Plus, the fact that I was at the gym at a time when not many others were there made me feel totally hard-core.  I was like, Wow, I am a workout goddess!  The workers must think I am super fit!  In my mind, having the gym staff think I'm super fit is the ultimate achievement in my fitness regimen.  If they think I'm fit, then it must be true... because they see every person that goes to the gym!  My Zumba instructor once told me that she thought I was a dancer... and that was the ultimate achievement in Zumba.  Also, if you have seen me dance, you would probably think I had some rare disease that caused a horrible coordination deficit... not that I was a dancer.

Anyway, if Sunday morning is the best time to go to the gym, then Monday evening is the worst.  After many disappointing trips to the gym on Monday evenings, I have now just completely sworn off Monday workouts.  When I go on a Monday, I always have to park at the back of the lot.  And, it's not that I mind walking from the far side of the lot... it's more that I get filled with a sense of dread when I realize how many people must be inside for there to be this many cars outside.  And, then it's even worse when I actually see all of these people.  It's like a swarm of bees buzzing, with all the machines whirring along.  You can smell the distinct scent of sweaty bodies and feel the heat generated from simply having that many people in one room together.  It is not pleasant, I must say.  Then, I look at the elliptical sign-up, and it's full... and the rowing machine is taken... and all of the treadmills with personal TVs are signed up for.  So, I have to take a treadmill without a personal TV.  Do you know how boring it is to run on a treadmill with nothing to do but look in front of you at a mute MSNBC?  I hate MSNBC... and the big TV is always on MSNBC!  With no sound.  The only thing worse than MSNBC is having to just watch it... without being able to at least hear what is being said... because God knows there is no action to watch.  Ugh, it's awful.  And, did I mention that every time I'm on one of those stupid TV-less treadmills that the same over-cologned guy always takes the treadmill next to me?!  If you have never tried breathing in cologne while running, just take my word for it that it isn't fun.  It is somewhat of an added challenge... kind of like breathing at a higher altitude... hmm, maybe it's good for my workout...?

You know, perhaps every morning is like Sunday morning at the gym.  I wouldn't know because I am incapable of engaging in cardiovascular activity at 6:30 am... which is what time I would have to be at the gym on a weekday if I wanted to work out in the mornings.  I'm actually incapable of even waking up at 6:30 if I don't absolutely have to.  7:00 is no problem... but there's something about that added 30 minutes that makes it completely impossible.  I do know that Saturday mornings are less crowded than most evenings... though even Saturday mornings don't compare to Sunday morning's desolation.  

Oh, how I wish every morning were Sunday morning.  The gym would be deserted and enjoyable... and I wouldn't have to work.  That would also be an awesome development.  Ok, God, get to work on that "every day is Sunday" thing... just think of all the worship you would get... really, I think it's in your best interest...