ALCRTY and the Art of Vanity Plates

Somewhere, some car possesses a personalized ("vanity") license plate that is clever and worthy of existence.  I have yet to encounter this car, but many have tried and fallen short of glory.

No.

Awful.

This mildly amuses me.

Seriously, though... I hate vanity license plates.  I have yet to see one that makes me think "I would totally want to have that 6-letter phrase on my car every day as a representation of myself for all the world to see."  I can't even think of something that I would put on a license plate if forced to make a vanity plate.  Not one single thing comes to mind that I like so much I would want it in writing on my vehicle.

I'm very indecisive... and capricious.  I used to change the style and color of my hair constantly because I could never make up my mind and got tired of each style so quickly.  I had trouble with long-term relationships because I always craved change.  I don't like making a decision and having to stick with it.  I grow restless.  This is why I'm convinced that I could never get a tattoo.  And why I stress over what I could possibly name my future hypothetical children.  How I have managed to remain married for over 5 years is a mystery.  Must be one of those "the exception proves the rule" things, a concept that I have yet to fully grasp.


I think that vanity license plates generally fall into three categories:  descriptive, names, and undecipherable.

Descriptive:  Refers to a characteristic of the driver or the car.  Some actual examples:  HOTROD, HI IQ 2, EYE DR, LUV BUG, MOMSCAR, LAWYER (particularly awful - are you not afraid of some criminal bashing your car in?)

Names:  Simply the person's name/nickname, in some configuration.  Some actual examples:  MANDY, JEN 92, JLX4 (all 4 members of family had initials JL).

Undecipherable:  Either I can't figure out what it is supposed to say, or don't understand why it is on a license plate.  I can't remember any from the former category, as they are simply jumbles of letters/numbers to me, but here are some examples of the second category:  ALCRTY (Alacrity, I'm guessing?  But, why?), NVSWRK (Nervous Wreck - again, why put this on your car?).


What prompted this post?  I saw the ALCRTY license plate, and I had to look up what the word alacrity even meant to understand why someone had this as their license plate.  Alacrity:  promptness in response; cheerful readiness.  Cheerful readiness?  Nope, not seeing it.  Simply a weird license plate.  Or I guess it could have meant "a-la-carte-y"... but, seriously, what's the point of a vanity plate if the driver is the only one who 1) knows what it even says and 2) understands the meaning behind it.  The whole reason they are called vanity plates is because they are for all the world to see... something "personalized" that represents something about you.  What's the point if no one "gets" it?

My last license plates were AB8... then a combination of 3 random letters/numbers (which I will not disclose so no one tries to steal my identity... hey, it could happen!).  Because AB8 sounds like "abate", I was seriously concerned that someone would assume it was a personalized plate, and try to figure out some meaning for the second set of numbers.  This troubled me.  It wasn't simply the fact that people might think I had vanity plates, but who knows what kind of awful or ridiculous things they could come up with for what my plate meant?  I was very happy when I got new plates that resemble no words whatsoever.  I am a nondescript member of the driving community, once more!  Huzzah!

No offense to my vanity plate friends... after all, some of my examples came from friends and family members.  I do not judge people for having vanity plates.  I simply, personally, hate the plates.  Thus far in life, I've never seen a vanity plate that has inspired a change of mind.  And, ALCRTY is not helping the cause...